Staying in a relationship for too long can sometimes make things seem monotonous. Here are some tips on how to keep your relationship hot and spicy.
In a long-term relationship, it’s common to lose the spark. That’s because you’re more likely to move from “passionate” to “compassionate” love the longer you’re with someone. Passionate love is more about physical stimulation while compassionate love helps you form a deep emotional relationship with your man.
As a result, that can make things get a bit monotonous at times. So scroll down for 13 ideas on how to keep your relationship hot and spicy.
Read more: Should you kiss him on the first date?
Note: This post may contain affiliate links, which means if you buy from my link I might make a small commission. This does not affect the price you pay. See the full affiliate disclosure here.
How to keep your relationship hot and spicy
1. Surprise each other
Most of us love little things that show genuine love and care. Surprise your partner with some thoughtful gestures every now and then. It can be simple and cute as writing a love note on the steamy mirror in the bathroom or cooking his favorite meal (if you can).
Is he a fan of a music band or stand-up comedy? If you know he can’t get enough of it, get him tickets and better yet, join him and have a great time together!
2. Turn up the flirting volume
Just because you’ve been together for so long doesn’t mean you shouldn’t flirt with your man. In fact, flirting is most likely the most important thing you can do to keep your relationship alive. Flirting can be more enjoyable than hooking up. It’s what causes that sexual energy to build up in the first place.
So, throughout the day, send your lover nice texts. For a few seconds, lock gaze with him across the room. Take each other’s hands. Play a game of wrestle. Continue doing some of the fun, flirty things you did when you first met, and you’ll be able to keep the romance alive for the duration of your relationship.
3. Start a new tradition
Create new traditions that make you look forward to the future is a terrific way to learn how to keep your relationship hot and spicy. Holding your relationship responsible to the tradition(s) you choose such as visiting a new coffee shop monthly is a foolproof approach to making time for each other — and looking forward to it.
Trying new fun activities can improve your attachment and strengthen the ‘glue’ of your relationship. If the adventure is scary, like riding a crazy roller coaster, skydiving, or simply trying unusual cuisine, your body releases chemicals that help you bond with your partner. The ‘love hormone’ oxytocin and dopamine, the ‘feel good’ hormone, both play a role.
4. Rekindle the activities that first made you fall in love
That is, other from sex. Make a list of things you used to do together that gave you both pleasure – they can be wonderful date ideas. You may have let some of those ambitions fade into the past as you transitioned from continuously feeling head over heels to ordinary living.
Reintroducing them can make you feel that high, so-in-love-might-actually-die feeling all over again, whether it’s rambling through your city to find hidden jewels or making extravagant dinners together.
Don’t just say you’ll do things and then forget about them. Aim to do them at least once a month so you always have something to look forward to.
Read more: 80 compliments a guy can’t resist
5. Switch things up a little
For our sexy alter egos, our homes might be a hostile environment. After all, you might be mom and dad, chef and chauffeur at home. So, if you have the opportunity, plan a trip somewhere fresh. Even if it’s only a night away in a nearby hotel doing something new and making new memories together, it’s worth it.
Take it out from the house as everyone gets weary of the same settings. It’s great to invest in some time spent in a new location. Inspire some enthusiasm if you’re wondering how to keep your relationship hot and spicy.
6. Have date nights on a regular basis
Just because you’ve finally found love doesn’t mean you should put your dating life on hold. It’s fantastic to get to know your partner by staying home, watching Netflix, and mainly living in sweatpants.
However, this can cause the spark to die very quickly. Because you’ve stopped going on dates, don’t transform your love partner into a roommate. Even after you’ve passed through the conventional courting stage, you still need to court them.
Make a weekly plan to dress up and do something fun and exciting with just the two of you. Get away. Take risks. If you want to make out on the street, go ahead. It will help keep your relationship fresh.
7. Make him your hero
Rather than focusing on what doesn’t work, it’s best to find what you love about your man. Try catching him in the act of heroism, because ladies, men are natural problem solvers. When a man loves you, he’ll want to be your hero. According to relationship expert James Bauer, this revolves around a man’s three natural drivers. However, many women don’t know this.
Men desire usefulness. They want to feel useful in your life. With the hero instinct, coined by the relationship expert James Bauer, you can encourage him to keep stepping up and showing you how much he loves you.
The hero instinct, when triggered, indicates that these drivers are encoded into men’s DNA. Your man will start to notice how amazing he feels with you again, which increases the attraction. Simply alter your behavior, awaken his inner hero, and watch how things spice up between you two.
In this great free video, James Bauer will show you how to connect with your man to activate this very normal male desire. So, if you want to learn more how to keep your relationship hot and spicy, follow Bauer’s groundbreaking advice. Take a look at this review for a better insight into his work.
8. Take some time apart
Whether you and your partner spend every waking moment together or you’ve been living miles apart for years, time apart can be beneficial.
Spending time apart from your man, even if it’s just an hour at a hot yoga class or a weekend away on a girls’ trip, will allow your partner to miss you, and vice versa. Doing your own thing will also give you something new to chat about and catch up on, breaking up the monotony.
I don’t think I need to suggest self-care, but love yourself by taking time for yourself and doing what you want every now and then will boost your self confidence. And we’ve all seen what happens when a woman takes the initiative… Hello there, spark!
9. Get on the road
Vacations are intended to be thrilling and pleasant, but as people get older, many couples over-plan their vacations and end up following the same itinerary or camping out on the same stretch of sand every year. While those getaways are still delightful, they don’t exactly stoke the passions of love.
An unplanned road trip might be one of the most effective methods to learn how to keep your relationship hot and spicy. Travel to the coast. Book an Airbnb for the weekend. You can choose your own trip and experience some sexy moments without being bound by a schedule.
10. Together, make sexy secrets
Inside jokes between you and your friends may establish a special bond. Keeping secrets between you and your sweetheart is another technique to boost sexual chemistry.
Sneak away for a big make out session during a dinner party. Attempt something risky (to increase adrenaline) like sneaking into a park after hours. The joint adrenaline increase helps to reignite the sentiments connected with limerence when you break the rules together (within reason).
Did you know that a guy needs a certain “secret ingredient” in a relationship to experience passionate, committed love. Download this FREE EBOOK to learn more.
11. Turn it into a game
Creating a passion wheel is a fantastic way to try new things. It’s likely that the craft will get you banned from Pinterest, but it’s still worth it.
To make a pie chart, draw a circle on a large sheet of paper and divide it into 12 pieces. In each slice, you and your lover can take turns writing a romantic or sexual behavior. Fill six slices with any activities you like, from taking a bubble bath to watching pornography to indulging in mutual masturbation, and then pick one each time you have sex.
You might even try an adult version of a high school favorite: split some wine and then let the bottle choose for you after you’re done.
12. Have sex
Most importantly -yes, sex! It’s great when you two can agree on how often you would have sex. Allowing the stereotype of sex waning in marriage to become true (or truer) in your relationship is a mistake.
Are you asking how to keep your relationship hot and spicy? Just reconnect with the man you committed to by lying down in bed (or wherever!) with him.
Simply hop back on your bike and ride; everything will work out. Stop waiting till you’re “in the mood” because it’s a waste of time.
13. Make the change yourself rather than waiting for your man
If you keep asking for more romantic things from your partner, it can feel like nagging. Think about how much more you can give to him instead of constantly asking.
When you’re with Mr. Right, your additional effort will be noticed, and he’ll be motivated to reciprocate. Don’t be stingy with your devotion. If you truly love him, show it.
Relationships need work – that is unavoidable. However, life gets in the way occasionally, and we prioritize other elements of our lives above our partners. That’s when things seem too monotonous for us to enjoy as we forget how love began to sparkle on the first date (or not).
Hopefully these 13 tips on how to keep your relationship hot and spicy give you motivations to live your life as joyfully as it should always be. Leave comments below and let me know what you think.
13 surprising ideas to spice up your love life again
- Surprise each other
- Turn up the flirting volume
- Start a new tradition
- Rekindle the activities that first made you fall in love
- Switch things up a little
- Have date nights on a regular basis
- Make him your hero
- Take some time apart
- Get on the road
- Together, make sexy secrets
- Turn it into a game
- Have sex
- Make the change yourself rather than waiting for your man
A hot relationship means both people in this love connection are closer to meeting one other’s needs. On the other hand, the relationship is cold if they aren’t doing enough to meet each other’s needs.
If a couple isn’t spending as much time together as they used to, that is a sign of a relationship beginning to wane. Additionally, they intentionally come up with
reasons not to hang out and claim to be “too busy” for their partner.
There are numerous causes for couples to split up. Lack of emotional connection,
sexual compatibility issues, disparities in life goals, as well as ineffective
communication and dispute resolution techniques, are the most typical causes of
relationships ending. There are no right or wrong explanations for breaking up.
Further reading: How to keep the spark alive in a long-term relationship