Let’s change the mindset that being feminine is tantamount to being weak while masculinity is being glorified in society. Knowing how to be more soft and feminine doesn’t make you as weak and shallow as how other individuals view it.
There’s more to feminity than appearing girly like a barbie doll and speaking in a feminine voice like Bernadette on Big Bang Theory.
However, the goal of this article is not to degrade masculinity and uplift feminity because I believe there’s no competition between the two if people could only embrace and accept their identities and differences and the roles they play on this planet.
Table of Contents
Note: This post may contain affiliate links, which means if you buy from my link I might make a small commission. This does not affect the price you pay. See the full affiliate disclosure here.
What is the nature of femininity?
Femininity embodies characters and traits that are unique and appropriate to women. A feminine woman possesses traits such as sweetness, gentleness, warmth, affection, nurturance, tenderness and protectiveness.
How To Be More Soft And Feminine
Apparently, there are more than one not-so-secret ways to enhance your femininity that you will uncover here below in this post. So ladies, here we go..
How to feel more feminine
– Get in touch with your inner feminine energy
Do not be afraid of exploring your identity and what makes you feel good being in your own skin. Women are feminine in nature, you just need to reawaken that energy and connect with it.
Being feminine is parallel to sensuality and being sexy and you can start with doing things that make you feel sexy like buying yourself an outfit.
Sometimes the answers that we are looking for are just hidden within us if we could only try to connect with our inner thoughts. If you want to feel more feminine, you should explore more about yourself in an introspective manner. You can do meditation, do journals every day or talk to an expert during therapy.
– Look after yourself
As a woman, you wear many hats – mother, sister, nurse, girlfriend, nanny, housewife – no wonder you’re getting weary too.
You have lots of obligations and responsibilities to fulfil that you sometimes forget yourself. As a feminine woman and nurturing in nature, you have the instinct to take care of your loved ones but the most important thing before you can take of others is to take care of yourself first.
Be gentle in and with your thoughts
Think of the soft rustling of the leaves and the gentle flow of the water the last time you were in nature – that should be the state of your mind.
Remember, all come from our minds. You can’t feel soft and feminity if your mind is in total chaos. Whatever you think, it reflects in your actions. Whatever you have in mind, it becomes you.
You should rest and release all the tensions you have gathered in a healthy way so you can also give your mind some break from thoughts that hinder you from having positive and gentle thoughts.
How to look more feminine
If you’re asking about how to be more feminine in appearance or physically and how to make your face more feminine, then we got you covered in this section. Trust me, you don’t have to change your appearance surgically.
– Shave or trim hairy area
If you have excess hair in your body, that means you have a high level of testosterone, which is an androgen and a male sex hormone. So for you to achieve looking for the feminine appearance, you can start shaving your hairy legs and trimming your eyebrows.
Trimming your eyebrow gives you also clean and well-kept features.
Here are some products you might be interested in to achieve a feminine look starting with trimmed eyebrows:
– Have a smooth and lustrous hair
You don’t have to grow out your hair to a waist level if you don’t want to have long hair, especially in summer. But you can always make your hair bouncy and lustrous to achieve looking more soft and feminine.
Healthy hair signifies good reproductive health and fertility in women which also attracts men.
So how can you achieve that?
Simply, you can apply coconut milk to your hair which is common by the way in Asian households. My mother used to apply it to our hair at least twice a month. Applying coconut milk will make your hair lustre and shinier.
-Make your lips softer and fuller
Nope, you don’t have to undergo Botox Lip Flip to appear more feminine. While I don’t condemn people who do this, I still think natural is always better.
If you don’t have naturally full pouty lips like Angelina Jolie or Scarlet Johansson, you don’t have many options but to use cosmetics unless you want to have a real bee bite your lips and achieve that bee-stung lips literally.
But we don’t want to reach that audacity, right!
How to have soft and pouty lips
- You can apply cinnamon to make your lips fuller. According to this website, you can mix a teaspoon of sugar, coconut oil and cinnamon to make an exfoliating scrub that you can apply directly to your lips.
- You should use lip contour to have a defined and accentuated form of your lips. You may have thin lips but if you use a lip liner, they will look fuller. Plus, it serves as a guide when you apply lipstick and avoids smudging.
- Apply lipstick to complete your feminine look, of course. Here’s a matte lipstick you might like to check out for your lips.
- If you think applying lipstick and a lip liner is too much, you can use a lip balm to give your lips a softer texture and appearance.
– Work on your body
You don’t need to have a slim body to look feminine, even curvy women are viewed as more feminine. As long as you feel good with whatever body type you have, you can surely embody feminity perfectly.
But if you think you’re gaining pounds, you don’t feel good anymore and it influences how you view and carry yourself, then it’s time for you to make a change.
Even thin women have insecurities too. Regardless of your body type, you should know what’s best for you and your well-being. Remember, a healthy perspective of your body image affects how you act and carry yourself around people.
If you are curvy, embrace it and show your healthy curves.
If you are slim, love it and show your advantages.
If you are gaining weight and it somehow disturbs you, then accept it and do something.
– Clean your nails
Don’t you find that appealing to find the clean and cut nails of a woman? If she’s keeping it clean, then surely she’s thinking of her hygiene and of the people she’s taking care of which is only appropriate for women.
But if you see longer unkempt nails in a woman, you might scrunch your face and think differently and maybe judge her for not taking care of her womanly attributes the right way. And you don’t want that to happen to you.
But if you’re that kind of woman who loves to see her nails, chic and stylish, then there’s nothing wrong with using nail polish.
-Take care of your skin
Clear and smooth skin is an indication that a woman is taking care of her health and puts herself first so she can fulfil her responsibilities well as a woman.
How can you take care of your skin so you’ll look more feminine?
- Drink more water so you won’t get dry and scaly skin from dehydration.
- Apply body lotion or sunscreen to protect your skin from the sun.
- Limit bath time as longer baths and showers could remove natural oil from your skin.
- When shaving your skin, apply a shaving cream or moisturizer to protect your skin.
- Use facial toner before you apply anything on your face like makeup.
How To Look Attractive Without Makeup
11 Great Ways To Become Pretty as a Woman
How to dress feminine?
Dressing may seem a challenge for some women who are used to putting on what they find in their closet, but it’s not that difficult to throw in some feminine look with how you dress up.
Start wearing a skirt
Only after my finishing my Bachelor’s Degree that I started wearing skirts because I didn’t dare wear them in college. When I started wearing skirts, I feel really feminine and it is easy to pair with other tops. Skirts are also comfortable to wear, unlike jeans which feel really tacky sometimes.
Minimize wearing tees
T-shirts are designed for men – they are formless and they are boring which is not a good start to ooze feminine power in your appearance and fashion style.
While I love wearing tees at times, because heck, they’re really comfortable and if I’m having the mood of ”the heck with all of you”, I’m going to wear my tee or anything I like to put on.
But if I’m really in the mood, my feminine energy should come out and it shows in how I dress up for the day by sporting a dress, especially in summer or any stylish blouse to pair with jeans or skirts.
Like skirts, dresses are also pleasant and easy to wear – it doesn’t have a lot of complications when you wear them because they’re designed to be that way – comfy and casual!
Choose the right hue
If you ask a random person what a feminine colour is, I bet he would answer ”pink”. Even in gender reveal videos, you could see pink represents a baby girl and blue for a baby boy.
So is there really a rule as to what colour you should be wearing to enhance your femininity?
Personally, I would not stick to the 1-colour rule. It’s not because it’s boring but I don’t base my femininity on the colour of my stuff.
What matters is, that whatever colour you wear, you wear it with confidence and elegance.
Sure, you can wear a pink dress, pink sandals, pink headbands and a pink bag. You might look like a walking sugar cotton candy, but if you can carry that out well, I don’t see a problem there.
The not-so-secret tip in enhancing your feminine energy is choosing the right shade for you and your personality.
It is not really my favourite colour, but I like embracing neutral and nude colours in my fashion style. Not because it’s a trend (or maybe not anymore) but because I like the simplicity it brings.
Admittedly, I’m not really a wearer of heels and I prefer sneakers and sometimes sandals in summer.
According to a study, heels add to the femininity and attractiveness of the woman which is quite obvious by the way.
You see a woman in heels, it’s like pheromones are walking alongside her too – that’s how strong heels are. No wonder men are into women in heels.
But should I force myself to wear heels because of that fact?
Heck, no. I wear it if I had to -like for formal occasions perhaps.
But on normal days, nope.
Sneakers are way more convenient in my present lifestyle. I just can’t imagine myself walking in heels in the neighbourhood while Chappy drags me around because he smells something.
If you had to choose between sneakers and heels, pick what’s more convenient for you like I would do.
If wearing heels is normal and easy for you, then I don’t see any reason for you to change that.
Choose where you find your comfort because in your comfort you will bloom no matter what kind of shoes you wear.
How to be more feminine in a relationship
Let the guy bask in his masculinity.
In other words, let him be the boss but not boss you around. Bossing you around has nothing to do with your femininity.
Exploring your femininity doesn’t make you meek and compliant with what your partner tells you to do.
But it doesn’t mean you have to contradict every time. You just need to know what’s right and what’s not right.
Let the guy find his role in the relationship and allow him to fulfil it.
If you’re a strong-willed and independent woman, soften a little and let your partner does his own business unless he asks you to.
Give back to your partner his role in the relationship
If you’ve been doing everything that a man usually does, you’re losing your identity as a feminine being.
You should stop being the man in the relationship. You can’t be both girlfriend and boyfriend or wife and husband at the same time.
You have yourself to take care of.
Women can be complicated. It seems to everyone that women don’t know what they want – a yes is actually a no, or a no is actually a yes – so they said.
When a woman takes the reign in the relationship, acting as if she knows everything because she thinks the guy doesn’t have the capacity to fulfil his roles, she would hate it in the long run.
Because she doesn’t want to be the guy in the relationship anymore, she wants to be taken care of and she wants to rely on the man to make decisions.
Giving your partner more responsibilities in the relationship may not be smooth afterwards, but he will learn from mistakes and setbacks and you’re free from bitterness and resentment from controlling and doing everything because you think you can.
How to speak more feminine
There’s no right or wrong on how the voice of a woman should sound – but if you hate your voice, then it’s for you to get a voice coach.
If you’re expecting to hear or read here that you should have a high-pitch voice to sound more like a woman, I guess I will disappoint you this time. If you’re a woman with a normal feminine voice, then you should embrace it and learn instead how to talk more the right way as a woman.
Talk softly accordingly
Feminine women have soft and tender traits and you can complement that with your voice and how you talk according to a situation, of course.
Sometimes, talking softly varies to whom, where and when you are talking.
If you are in a situation or a venue where talking loudly is highly discouraged, then you should respect that and speak softly.
Having a soft and quiet voice may be an indication of having low self-esteem or shyness which some people often assume.
If you hear requests to repeat yourself whenever you talk, then you’re indeed talking very quietly. If it disturbs you, then you should start talking a little louder next time.
Listen more, talk less
Talking less is not an indication that you’re clueless or dumb. In fact, you’re doing yourself a favour by avoiding committing mistakes or saying dumb things you might regret in the end.
Listening attentively makes the person you’re talking to feel important and heard of and by actively listening you are not only showing a positive attitude but you’re learning as well.
When you know how to talk less and listen more, you will get the same favour back – people will give you time to talk the moment you open your mouth.
Men love gossip too but women are more likely to gossip or spread rumors especially when it’s about their romantic rival.
However, a gentle empowered and confident feminine woman will not demean other women and doesn’t partake in an act where the lives of individuals are being discussed heavily and criticized about whether the gossips are true or not.
A feminine woman is kind and empathic and wouldn’t want to see other people or her fellow women suffer from the impact of rumors and gossip which may lead to depression, suicide and anxiety.
You can’t be a soft, affectionate and warm woman if, in every line of your sentences, you always add some expletives.
For what, by the way?
If you’re angry, say it.
A feminine woman knows how to express her emotions and feelings and using curse words only signifies that you’re lacking in the communication department.
Cursing is also a sign of aggressiveness which a feminine woman doesn’t embody because she is gentle and down-to-earth in nature.
We’re not perfect and we’re clumsy too – so if you have stubbed your toe (ouch) while walking around your house, you can’t help but automatically swear, right?
That’s forgivable and normal.
But talking with curse words in every sentence is also normal for some but is unbecoming for a feminine woman.
Read related post: 7 Characteristics of Women With Class That Have Nothing To Do With Wealth
Do not disclose every detail of your life
Although feminine women are known to be expressive, it doesn’t mean she has to discuss every detail of their life with their friends and even on social media.
A woman should always remain a mystery especially if you’re seeing someone new. If you divulge everything to your date, then you’re removing the thrill of him getting to know you well.
If you’re in a relationship, it is not all the time you’re on cloud nine. Some women turn to social media – yeah, today you hate him, tomorrow, you love him to bits and pieces and he’s the best guy evah. And the whole world knows that.
While other women turn to their female friends which is also normal, especially if you’re having a bad day.
But it’s not a good idea to discuss your love life with your friends and you should stop doing that for many reasons like:
- your friends can be biased and
- may think of the worst scenario and put your partner in a bad light
- they might gossip about you to others
Read related post: 3 Things To Keep Private For A Quiet Life
How to embrace the feminine energy
– Accept masculinity
Female bodies produce a small number of androgens too, which are male hormones that’s why every woman has masculine traits and I don’t encourage you to get rid of those but rather see which works best for you.
If you have masculine traits, it doesn’t mean you are a lesbian or you will change your pronouns to ”they” already but rather use these traits to your advantage as long as it doesn’t disturb you.
– Do not seek validation
You want to feel important and you get that from hearing praises from your friends and loved ones.
But what if you made a mistake? You might not get the same attention you used to have.
You will be disappointed with yourself, and sometimes, you’ll lose interest.
As a feminine woman, you know you can get the same kind of validation from yourself alone and you don’t have to seek that from others.
You are your own cheerleader. You are proud of who you are and what you are because you’re accepting everything about yourself. You don’t live for others and above all, you don’t seek male validation.
– Accept vulnerability
Feminine women don’t have to be weak but it doesn’t mean they don’t have weaknesses.
If you know your weaknesses, and you’re not happy about it but do nothing, then you’re weak.
Working on your weaknesses makes you strong.
Remember, it takes a lot of courage to accept weakness. But don’t just accept weakness and vulnerability, acknowledge them so you are obliged to improve them.
– Empower other women
Who knows you better? Fellow women, right?
Over the course of time, women seek women for support and empowerment and women are stronger when they have a support system they know they can rely on.
While it is easy to say ”empowerment and empower other women”, you should know how to do it too.
You can empower other women by telling your story to encourage and uplift them. You can join networks of women and engage in their programs. You can also create your platform or a blog to encourage other women to have their voices heard in society.
– Indulge in your feminine attributes
You are a woman, a very feminine one. You have all the attributes physically, mentally and socially. Why don’t you use that to your advantage?
If you’re a feminine woman in a relationship, you should enjoy receiving compliments, gifts and adoration from your partner.
You don’t have to take the role of the man in the relationship if your man is capable of doing that. Your masculine traits should not clash with your partner’s masculinity because that would only jeopardize the relationship.
Be the woman and let him be the man to take care of you, take you and support you.
If you’re a single woman, enjoy your singleness and femininity because masculine men are attracted to femininity of the women.
Wear a makeup (if you want), put on your best dress and smile because you’re embracing your feminine energy.
Closing Words: How To Be More Soft And Feminine
Now you know the ways on how to be more soft and feminine as a woman, it’s your time to apply them in your life.
Embrace your feminine energy, use them to your advantage and empower other women to find their feminine energy.